gossips of my heart

Wednesday, April 30, 2008 @5:00 pm

hahaha
i know im so sweet
everyone is so touched
lol

[tttw] ah please lor, I've all the right to be carefree, I've lived for 19 years and have finished my A levels! lol. good that you've passed it to me, you're in no position to have it now. haha. JIA YOU! STUDY HARD!!!
[deb] ah i know ;) :p check your schedule soon! many many people want to book me! lol
[clarissa] it was hell writing it! lol. haven't written in ages. will have to do such things more often before i become a fake ang moh lang. haha. well, so far, i'm free all evenings of next week except tuesday.

@3:50 pm

Being out of school and in the 'real world' has taught me many things; one of the main things being to appreciate and have a deeper understanding of the chinese phrase: 各有千秋， everyone has their own good and bad point, talents, skills etc.

Having grown up in a system that very efficiently segregates children according to their intellectual calibre, I'd always been surrounded by people similar to myself. There might have been activities where we interacted with other groups of people, but always as different groups working together, each being aware of the seemingly acute differences, never really coming together as one. Being put together on the same level and having to work together for an extended period of time is a whole new experience altogether.

With people from all sorts of different backgrounds coming together, working on the same thing, one has to come to a compromise as to the pace of things and the manner in which things are done. Initially, I thought others very incapable and inapt and uncomparable to myself. But in time, I learnt to come off my high horse. Although it might be more difficult to start a relationship with someone so seemingly different from yourself than with someone you can relate to immediately, all that's needed is an open mind and a willingness to make the effort.

Of the two ingredients to make a 'rojak' team work, I'd say the more important would be the latter. If there ever was a preconception or a stereotype about the type of person the other party was, that's the first thing that'll have to be binned. While putting people you see on the streets or around you into convenient compartments and having 'interesting' ideas about them might be fun, I've learnt that it isn't very helpful in forming personal relationship; not totally that is. One can't help having certain 'first impressions', and these impressions are definitely not formed groundlessly. The danger comes, I feel, when one starts expanding on these impressions, this time, groundlessly. This is when stereotyping comes in. Thus, the action needed here is to be fair about one's opinion of others, and be conscious of how these opinions are formed. Once people start seeing each other as another human being to get to know, one doesn't interact with this person with a preconceived notion of what kind of a person he is.

Once preconceived notions of others are done away with, it is pretty easy to recognise others' abilities and accomplishments. Coming from different backgrounds, everyone would have talents in different areas, received different methods of training/learning, formed different perspectives to issues etc. While each of us might have our own convictions about certain things (which probably stems from the way we were brought up/educated), one should not form ideas about the minds of others, but be open to new and different thoughts about things.

I'm glad I didn't take up some office job. Things would have been very much different, and I'd have learnt this much later in life.
It is good to be confident of one's capabilities and to make use of them, however, it is of utmost importance not to form a superiority complex and compartmentalise others.

Oh dear, this is a very badly written piece of work.
Partly because I don't want to very explicitly admit certain things about myself and have hence veered from my main point.
Also partly because I haven't written for ages!

Ha, I think I am in great need to come to terms with my own shortcomings. My looking for excuses for the above badly written piece of work is a prime illustration of my inability to do so! lol.

but, nvm
you know you love me

@12:50 am

Friends
© Joe Aziz

Verse 1:
What are friends,
I've often wondered.
Friends have come,
And Friends have gone.
Seldom do I hear their voices,
Like old forgotten songs.
I've walked a thousand lonely miles,
And often wondered, "What went wrong?"
But I've got to make you see;
A friend to you I'll always be.
A friend to you I'll always be.

Verse 2:
A friend is not a thing to trade,
Not to bo bought, nor to be sold;
Not the ring upon your fingers.
It's not the bills which you fold,
Not the coins your pocket holds.
A friend is young, A friend is old.
And I've got to make you see,
A friend is true, a friend is free;
A friend to you I'll always be.
A friend to you I'll always be.

Verse 3:
A friend is not the fancy car,
In which you ride around.
A friend is not the little pill,
That makes you head spin round and round.
A friend is not the needle,
That creates the clouds,
On which you fly.
It's not the smoke that makes you high,
But a hand that's always by,
To wipe the tears from your eyes,
Should the world make you cry.
And I've got to make you see,
Our friendship grows like a tree;
A friend to you I'll always be.
A friend to you I'll always be.

(Verse 4 is irrelevant. haha)

you know you love me! :D

Monday, April 28, 2008 @11:53 pm

又是一个星期了。。。
我答应了(一个很可爱的)某某人，我下一次写博客，会用华文，现在试试看吧。
这几个月，时间真的过得好快。岁月不留人. 一转眼，一个星期有过去了。很快的，我们完成了小学，中学和初中。不久，朋友们都要上大学了。很快的，我就环游世界，到处飞了。

既然谈到朋友这话题，我就写写关于朋友的事吧。

我以前写过好几篇关于朋友的篇章了。里边都谈了我们人生中遇到的不同的朋友，所以现在不多说了。
有我身边几个要好朋友，我觉得非常幸福。

ceci: 我们俩的友情真的是非常奇妙。这么多年来，天天聊天，常常出去，但又从来没吵过架。我们视以不同，但也非常相似。我们什么事情都谈得来。好笑的，好哭的，好论的，无聊的。。。小学的时候，我从来也没想过会和你成为那么要好的朋友。就如你所说的，我们只懂得彼此的存在。但现在有你这最要好的朋友，非常幸运:)2008年的确使我们的友情坚强多了，我们更加的理解彼此。大家这几年来这么忙，但又能给对方抽出时间。以前我会担心，咱门各走各的路时，会不会和彼此疏远，可是我现在能很肯定地说，细水长流。(until i think of the correct phrase :p)

hil: 想到你，我就想到我们吵吵闹闹的日子。在班上和你一起坐，几乎每天都会和彼此斗嘴。吵得非常起劲。我们作弄老师也有很多乐趣。还有，一起读德文，一起听乐曲，一起看表演等等。你到美国已经好一段时间了，我们虽然抽不出时间经常谈话，但是如今还是好朋友。

debo: 我第一天到维初，踏进班的时候，你是第一个问候我的同学。那时，我还只认为你是个很nice的同学，但我们慢慢的成了好朋友。应该是作专题作业的时候开始吧，渐渐地谈得更起劲。现在，成为了好朋友。从初院毕业了，还常常出去，谈话，聊天， chill。。。希望以后也一样！ :D

yaqi: 不知道什么时候，你变成了我的好朋友。小学当学长的时候，和你还蛮要好的，到了中学，就没在联络了。直到我们在德文课又碰见。起初还是那种aqquaintance而已，出院的时候，不知不觉地变成了你得dearie。毕业过后，每个星期三和你也起逛街，吃饭，聊天，过得很enjoyable。现在我们大概各走各的了，但希望还能常常联络，一直促进友情。

andreas: 你啊？也不知道及时成了这么好的朋友，和你谈私人的事。可是既然成了好友，很高兴有你这么一个朋友。虽然我们现在没什么时间catch up，但一起出去时，都是非常有意的。

tony & aaron: 我两个可爱的小弟弟！能够认识你们真是我的福。你们给我带来了许多笑容和欢乐。4年前成了好朋友，什么事都能商量，什么事都非常好玩，一起过着的时间都非常有趣。当然，还有为彼此操心的时候，（尤其是你们为考试而烦恼的时候！）我们现在各忙各的，但是还会常常在msn聊天，也一定还要抽出时间meet up哦！

olly: 这么多年不见，最近再见面，好像一点时间也没过似的。希望从此以后再也不会在失络！而既然某人说我只写那一句,我就再加多几句!知道你喜欢我的陪伴,因为我非常的可爱!要继续保持联络,记得我们的约定,至少每两星期出去一次哦!=)

当然，我还有许多好朋友。Eileen, Elizabeth, Lena, Clarissa, 新交的SIA同事等等。
其实，我很佩服那些能够和很多人keep in touch的人。你们哪来那么多时间和精神啊？
我知道维持友情和爱情都是很重要的，可是，我一直都认为，人生中，只要有几个非常好的朋友就足够了。我对我的朋友非常满意。哈哈。谢谢你们的友谊！
但是，那些能够和横多人来往的人，如果有什么秘密，说一说吧！

Tuesday, April 22, 2008 @10:37 pm

My my, it's been quite a while again.
I've been happily caught up in my event packed life.
Going for work, meeting friends after work, chilling out in the evenings...
Reading books, watching movies, planning outings...
thats the life!
Living the moment!
Let us all enjoy these few carefree months before some of you get drowned with academic work again.

It's nice to:
finally catch up with old friends
find that hardly any ground has been lost through the years of non-contact
get to know some people you've had misconceptions about
and find that they are actually pretty nice afterall

I love life :D
you know you love me

Sunday, April 13, 2008 @10:35 pm

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emo_(slang)

http://www.anti-emos.de/

i am very amused...
but i do suppose that it's worth writing about...
lazy to air more of my thoughts

Wednesday, April 09, 2008 @10:31 pm

What mental disorder do you have? Your Result: ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) You have a very hard time focusing, and you find it difficult to stay on task without your mind wandering. You probably zone in and out of conversations and tend to miss out on directions because you cannot focus
GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder)
OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)
Manic Depressive
Paranoia
What mental disorder do you have?

ha i don't think so though
i don't listen probably just because the conversations simply don't interest me :p

Which Positive Quality Are You? Your Result: Peace You are Peace. Peace is the opposite of anger and destruction. Peace is calm. It tears down barriers; it brings us together. Peace is a noble goal sought by the good of heart. "May peace prevail on earth."
Friendship
Charity
Love
Faith
Courage
Which Positive Quality Are You?

wah...really meh?
lol!

Your life is 46% crappy!

You have an OK life, but there is some serious crappage creeping in. You're probably not homeless, but change is needed.

How crappy is your life?
Quizzes for MySpace

excuse me?!?
i think i have a very nice life thank you very much!

You've Experienced 48% of Life

You have the life experience of someone in their early 20s.
You've seen some of what life has to offer - but you have a long ways to go.

How Much Life Experience Do You Have?
Make a Quiz

hmm, okay. i suppose this is the first acceptable result...

How will I die? Your Result: You will die in a car accident. Please, continue to buckle up, and try not to speed. More likely than not, it will happen very randomly and quickly. Occasionally, this result stands for death in a plane crash. Do not fear transportation. Avoid becoming a hermit, you cannot escape fate.
You will die in a nuclear holocaust.
You will die from a terminal illness.
You will die of boredom.
You will die in your sleep.
You will be murdered.
You will die while having sex.
You will die while saving someone's life.
How will I die? Create a Quiz

so i'm not too likely to be saving anyone's life!
die of boredom? really?!
what kind of quiz is this?!?!?!

Do Guys Think You're Difficult to Date Your Result: Sexy Challenge You know the moves that make men crazy for you. First, you get the give-and-take relationships need, and your kind to guys without being a wallflower. Plus, you pick your battles. Life's too short to sweat the small stuff.
Total Pushover
Dating Dictator
Do Guys Think You're Difficult to Date See All Our Quizzes

you think?

You Scored a 70% which means you are a ....

Sincere Lover. You are such a total sweetheart people have a hard time taking you seriously. Sadly, because you are so sincere and sweet you get walked all over. Try to hold your ground a little bit and beware of the selfish lover. The feed off of sincere lovers like yourself. Even though you get used and abused a lot you still have a heart of gold.

What kind of lover are you
Take More Quizzes

... ... ...

Are You Datable? Your Result: You are 50/50 Datable According to the results, you are and aren't ready to go on Dates. Somewhere in there is telling me that you know the basics of being in a relationship, but you just don't know how to keep one long lasting. So it's really 50/50 at this point. It'll either crash and burn or fly high in the sky.
You are Datable
You are Not Datable
Are You Datable? Create MySpace Quizzes

finally the truest thing this thingie has churned out?

Which God or Goddess are you? Your Result: Zeus Greek King of the Gods You are a powerful leader. You like to manipulate life to your own accord. You have many lovers. You like to rule over those who are powerless against your advances.
Ares Greek God of War
Dionsyus Greek God of Wine
Artemis Greek Goddess of the Hunt
Aphrodite Greek Goddess of Love
Hades Greek God of the Underworld
Which God or Goddess are you? Quizzes for MySpace

wow. world, here i come!

Which philosopher are you? Your Result: Aristotle Truth does not exist in some transcendent realm. We get to truth by applying reason to the physical world. The world follows logic and commonsense. Science if done properly is not to far from philosophy. --This quiz was made by S. A-Lerer.
Nietzsche
Sartre/Camus (late existentialists)
W.v.O. Quine / Late Wittgenstein
Early Wittgenstein / Positivists
Immanuel Kant
Plato (strict rationalists)
Which philosopher are you? Take More Quizzes

mmmm, this doesn't sound too bad...haha
life isn't always run on truths though...

Probability of killing, 40%

So you have problems with enemies, maybe dont have a high enough self-esteem, or play a few violent videogames. Cutting it a little close there. Try to keep your cool, alright?

Are you capable of killing

hoho...you'd better watch out, you'd better not cry...you'd better...

According to the results of this quiz, you LOVE you a 65%!!!

Doing not so bad-good! It's almost enough to start going around giving smooches and "I love you" hugs to all those closest to you, but just think it over, because you are a very SPECIAL and IMPORTANT person to the WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD and if you have made it this far and have all the things you do, WOW you are quite somebody, I tell you!!! LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF A LIL BIT MORE!!!

How much do you LOVE YOU?

yes, i know i love myself very much, thank you!

What type of Emo are you??? Your Result: Poser Emo!!! You think you're emo or you want to be emo.... No need to be ashamed. If you are just a new emo, than you just need to go deeper into the subject! And please don't wear tight pants that much.....
Not an Emo......
Awesome/Emotastic Emo!
Depressed Emo :(
Gay Emo/Stupid Emo
What type of Emo are you??? See All Our Quizzes

new emo? hurmph...
tight pants...like helloooooooo.......!!!!!

What Be Your Nerd Type? Your Result: Musician Doo doo de doo waaaa doo de doo! (<-- That's you playing something.) Everyone appreciates the band/orchestra geeks and the pretty voices. Whether you sing in the choir, participate in a school/local band, or sit at home writing music, you contribute a joy to society that everyone can agree on. Yay! Welcome to actually doing something for poor, pathetic human souls. (Just kidding.)
Drama Nerd
Social Nerd
Science/Math Nerd
Literature Nerd
Artistic Nerd
Gamer/Computer Nerd
Anime Nerd
What Be Your Nerd Type? Quizzes for MySpace

ah thank you very much. i know i'm very talented!
hoho

You are 65% eccentric.

It seems that you just can't find too many people you can relate to, doesn't it? But even though you often feel alone, you still manage to get along okay.

Are You An Eccentric?
Quizzes for MySpace

hmm...i don't seem to be very eccentric do i? which goes to show again how inaccurate this is!
lol

you know you

Tuesday, April 08, 2008 @6:47 am

oh great, you made my cry during make-up
only because you could still touch my heart
with your understanding, not in the dark
puts me at ease, though not exactly lark

a little lost, though it seems like a lot
a little cry, followed by a pep talk
the little lost, exchanged for a lot gained
a boon afterall, which seemed like a bane

am ende verstehst du, du kluge prinz
das letztes mal, ich an dir so denkt
es tut ein bisschen weh und auch traurig
aber ich werde auch wie dich, stark sein

it was and is, in the end, for the best
for now anyway, of that i am sure

hmmm another unorganized rushed out piece...
oh well, shall see what i can do in two days time or something
grr
fleet training exam...stupid aircrafts...so many things inside for what...grr...lol
busy busy busy!

you know you ... ...

Sunday, April 06, 2008 @8:58 pm

I look into the mirror
A stranger's watching me
Trembling lips
A cold shining in his eyes
The cage of my broken body
Only one way to escape
A screaming nightmare
I dream in red

The sky is dark and noisy
Voices in my head
They tell me that I'm
Free again
No more chains
Free again

Hey, hey, hey
I don't love you anymore
Hey, hey, hey
I don't love you anymore

I see your face in the crowd
Now it's time to sleep
I see fear and loathing
In your eyes
Why don't you touch me, baby?
This is the end
Come and feel the
Cold knife in my hand

but

Goodbye's the saddest word I'll ever hear
Goodbye's the last time I will hold you near
Someday you'll say that word and I will cry
It'll break my heart to hear you say goodbye

it hurts me like hell to hurt you this way
i'm childish and selfish and i darn't stay
i think i'll regret but t'is for the best
till i've seen the world, what's left and the rest

i pondered and wondered, i wasn't sure
now that i've done this at myself i jeer
a cowardly act, the easy way out
leaving you not knowing what t'is about

replies and responses have touched my heart
i now feel regret that we have to part
i shouldn't say this, heartbreaker i am
transient feelings, into the wall they'll ram

i'm sorry i gave hope in lines above
don't wait for me on purpose, i'm not worth

you told him feelings i didn't know i felt
you know me better than i know myself
i know we both appreciate all your help
thank you for all your help, in many different ways
for making me feel better
i'd never thought i'd say this
but fine, you're damn cute ;)

Tuesday, April 01, 2008 @9:40 am

hi i am xinyi's secretary and since shes a very busy woman i have taken the very important task of updating this blog to say "HI" to all her readers. don't worry she's very much alive. just lazy to update thats all(: