Tuesday, April 26, 2011 @12:22 am
We gotta fight fight fight fight fight for this love!
Monday, April 25, 2011 @11:47 pm
Dance used to be my drug
Thursday, April 21, 2011 @9:59 pm
My Series of Fortunate EventsYesterday, was our Ballare retreat. Where I thought that a huge seaview chalet would be so perfect. But as it turned out, it was so far into the other end of the world everyone either didn't turn up, or got spooked and didn't wanna stay. In any case, it didn't make sense for 4 of us to stay in the enormous place and do nothing, so we all locked up and left. But for an alternative I had, it would have been a sucky night (though the bbq was good :D)
Instead of going home to sleep, I went down to zouk to party, and it was a GOOD night!
Today, I was supposed to have a lovely lunch with clar, but I forgot to wake her up, and she also forgot to wake up herself. So in the end, I had a lovely afternoon by myself. I sat down in the middle of raffles city, had a crepe and smoothie for lunch, and proceeded to walk through all the shops in the mall. Top Shop, Warehouse, Marks & Spencers, Guess...it was such a nice feeling! Oh and I spent a ton of time in That CD Shop too! After making my rounds, I treated myself to a divine white chocolate cupcake from awfully chocolate and came home to a cup of camomile tea, before heading to the library!
This is looking to be another beautiful summer!
Friends (actually...ceci, deb, clar, eileen! lol) hurry finish your exams so you can play with me! Study hard! :D
Saturday, April 16, 2011 @6:31 pm
from thought catalog:
As you get older, you’ll see your friends dwindle down to a select few, and realize how rare it is to actually find lifelong friends. In high school, friendships were so ephemeral. In college, bonds were nurtured by the tight-knit environment created by school. When you graduate and are released into “the real world”, you no longer have any ties to anyone. You make the time for the people you genuinely care about. You say to the friends who matter,”Okay, things are no longer circumstantial. For us to remain close, we’ll actually have to put the work and time into it. I want to know you forever.” If you are still meeting people you want to know forever when you’re forty, consider yourself very lucky.
@5:08 pm
I am ready to be swept off my feet by an exciting summer romance!
Please fall from the sky!
@4:15 pm
Nothing like the mama mia soundtrack to brighten up a gloomy emo unproductive saturday afternoon! :)
Thursday, April 14, 2011 @11:59 pm
Someone posted the link for the trailer of 'The First Grader' on facebook:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0XUAkZbB_6c&feature=share
This is the story of Kimani Ng'ang'a Maruge, who enrolled in a primary school at the age of 84, after Kenya announced free education for all. He attended school everyday, even when he was in a wheelchair, and was even the head boy.
The story of a man who wanted so much to learn, and was so hardworking and conscientious. And here we are, being sick and tired of school.
Do we not appreciate what we have?
To a certain extent, no we do not. When we hear of stories like Maruge's, we sit back and think for while (like I am doing now), how lucky we are. But tomorrow, it'll probably all be gone.
Do we not see the value in education?
Of course we do, why else are we in uni?
Do we not enjoy learning?
I'm quite sure we do. Afterall, we picked our own courses.
Blame it on the system?
If Maruge lived in Singapore, would he be as overwhelmed with work as we are? Would be contemplate ponning classes? Would he complain of having to write papers and prepare presentations?
I think not.
But I think, it'd be a different matter if he had grown up in Singapore. He'd then probably be like the rest of us. Occasionally feeling as if education had been forced upon him, ploughing through piles of work to meet deadlines, to tackle exams...
My conclusion is that one would have to be as deprived as he was to have his attitude, otherwise it is rather inevitable to be like the rest of us...
Is this an excuse? I think so.
@1:36 pm
Was reading Lee Wei Ling's article on Sunday, and she wrote about how she sometimes didn't speak to or meet with her closest friends for years. Excuse me?! You wouldn't even know if they had kids, contracted and recovered from cancer, or if they died la -.-
Anyway, right in the middle of exams. Half done, weren't too terrible, though none of my exams in my uni life have been fantastic :( Half more! Cannot get sian!
Then its summer!!! Lots of meeting up with all my lovelies! :)
Saturday, April 09, 2011 @8:20 pm
How To Avoid Emotional Entanglements
APR. 8, 2011 By SHANTE COSME
So we’re at that point. The point where all the subtle probes into my intentions and hints that you’re “not hanging out with anyone else” have proven all too subtle and my answers far too vague. So after a few shots of whiskey, lying in your bed in the dark, you’ll bravely admit you want more. You’ll say you’re still not hanging out with anyone else but this time you’ll add that you don’t want to be either.
And I will ache to agree. I will be filled with the rational desire to tie a bow on the pretty little thing we’ve made these past few months, to make some sweeping promises in that dark room and claim you’re the only one I want but I won’t, because I would be lying. And I don’t like to lie, it’s bad for my karma.
So I’ll tell you I’m not ready. Partially because I’m not sure of what I want, but mostly because I do know what I don’t want. I do not want the responsibility that being committed to you entails. I don’t want to devote hours of my day wondering about yours, worrying about how even my smallest actions might affect you. I want to be unreasonable on a whim, and I don’t want to ask for permission. And I certainly do not want responsibility for the maintenance of your emotional health, because I can barely manage my own.
And yes, I want to be single because I want to date other people. I’m not a sex fiend or anything. In fact, I really like having sex with you, so I won’t be creeping at bars on the few nights we don’t spend together looking to undress someone new. However, having the option to do so is something I’m not yet willing to give up.
And you’ll try to be understanding, but we’ll both know you’re disappointed. You’ll tell me you’re going on a date with another girl and hope to see some semblance of distress on my face, a markedly restrained response made through clenched teeth or at least a furrowed brow. But my unaffected demeanor borders remarkable, the ease with which I can reveal it sometimes even takes me by surprise. I will be reasonable and understanding and even manage to say “have a good time” without any hint of irony or sarcasm.
I will even extend the same courtesy, and let you know that I am also dating. I will divulge as many details as your masochistic curiosities can handle, because I don’t want to intentionally deceive you. Like I said before, I am fiercely overprotective of my karma. I want to be selfish, not duplicitous. I hope you can appreciate that about me.
At first you’ll convince yourself to be satisfied with me, privately labeling my glaring commitment issues with attractive adjectives like “cute” or “coy.” You’ll talk to your friends about how you found this girl that totally lets you do your own thing. “She doesn’t get on me about anything”, you’ll proudly proclaim as they lament over the women they are dating, pesky creatures who constantly chatter about “getting serious.” But you don’t have to deal with that shit.
But you are secretly envious that they have the choice to deal with that shit. They have the option of “yes” waiting readily at their disposal but you don’t have the luxury of choice. You don’t mention that part to them.
And secretly, even though I try to imagine myself as impenetrably callous, I’ll start to falter under the weight of the choices I’m unable to offer and the promises I cannot make. We will go through the same motions, keep sharing our favorite appetizer at that small spot in my neighborhood and I’ll keep burying my head on the same spot on your shoulder when we sleep, but something will have burrowed a silent rift between us that will widen its ugly mouth with each passing day.
You will go from dismissive to slowly terrified of all that you have already invested in me. How do you take back all those hours? You’ve unknowingly put all this hope in my hands, and you’re no longer sure of what those hands are capable of.
I will be terrified of what to do with your fragile hopes and expectations of me. I’ll become unusually introspective and spend every waking hour ruminating over who I have become. The selfishness I wanted to embrace has, well, fully embraced me. It is monopolizing my mind like a starved virus and has quickly become insatiable. It is ravenous for my tenderness, my well hidden vulnerabilities and even my fear, because fear implies feeling and my selfishness feels very threatened by that.
That is when you will leave, and you’ll take back whatever you can from my clumsy and unwilling hands. I will be left with only wide open, empty palms, but I will not be alone. I will have the selfishness I endlessly defended and fought for to keep me company.
Wednesday, April 06, 2011 @1:50 am
Miss the pleasant distraction of a starbucks delivery... (: